Sunday

Liz is gone for a photo shoot; I'm sick (headcold or something); I just put the baby down for a nap. And, in the quiet of now, I want so badly to speak to my Mother. I miss her so much and I think now more than ever, with the uncertainty of Bella's condition, I need her!! I feel as though I need to be strong and protect Liz from just how serious this could be. She doesn't handle that sort of thing as well as me, but who do I turn to? I'm sorry; I'm sure most of this is coming from me not feeling well at all. I just want to sleep.

Speaking of sleep.............last night I put Bella down on her tummy unswaddled for the first time. I'm not completely comfortable with it as she does not yet roll over, but she turns her head well and lifts it great. She takes her naps on her tummy and does very well; she really prefers it. Anyway, she ate around 11:30 and usually wakes up needing to eat again at around 2:30 or 3. Last night I heard her talking about 2, but didn't go to her. I was waiting to see if she got upset. She didn't; after about 10 minutes of talking she got quiet. I went to check on her and she was sound asleep. She did this again around 4:30, then woke up at 5:30 crying ready to eat.

So, we may try this for a while to see how she does or if this is just a fluke. We've been wanting to wean her from the swaddle, but she does not do well on her back unswaddled. And, I'm not swaddling her after she is rolling over. I think that's more dangerous that putting her on her tummy now.

I think I'll head for the shower and try to wash of some of this melancholy before Liz comes home.